Marc: Hey, link how much it costs to speed up Friday’s.
Brian: 4 million gold.  Also, I seem to be getting only emails from Marc at the moment…
Joe: Dave sacrificed ½ day Vacation pet to end his Friday quest.
Brian: NOT FAIR!
Marc: I have 2hrs left of my hearth…
Joe: My total Griffon flight path time is 3 hours.
Brian: Hearth was better…Gryphon flight path time makes it sound like your ride home.
Joe: Fuck you Brian.

I’ve got three daily “e-mail buddies”, who, if you’ve read this site for a while now, you’ve met before. In no particular order, they are, Joe, Marc, and Brian. There was a time, a time I like to refer to as “The Glory Days”, when we all worked in the same office. Joe and I have worked together for nine years now, we are the senior members of the buddy group. Marc and Brian were hired as summer students in the summer of 2005 and were taken under our wing. Starting as naive, bright-eyed empty vessels eager for knowledge, we shaped and molded them into naive, bright-eyed targets for our constant mockery and ridicule. It was awesome.

Actually, Marc and Brian ended up being the first, and only, summer students we ended up keeping past their term. Brian is no longer with us. No, not dead, just not working here any more. Marc still works for our organization, but has moved to another office downtown. We’ve kept in touch since our foursome was ripped asunder – a time I refer to as “The Day The Music Died”. We sometimes play MMOs together, and we’ve since established a “not-quite-monthly” game night where we actually see each other face to face and consume all manner of sugar-based products.

It sucks that we don’t all work together any more though, because the days just aren’t as much fun. Joe and I can’t make fun of each other; we’re immune to it. If I call Joe a Farty McDouche, he just calls me one right back. With Marc and Brian though… it would have meant something, and like a brand new puppy eagerly fetching a tennis ball, they would have come back for more.

Thankfully, we still have e-mail. Sometimes, it’s the only thing that gets me through the day. I’ve created a new category of post called, oddly enough, e-mail, where I’ll post some word-for-word e-mail conversations that I find entertaining.

Below, you’ll find the latest conversation. The highlighted name is the person who sent the particular message. We always use the Reply-to-all feature so that the whole group is involved, except for the not-so-rare occasion when Marc forgets where the Reply-to-all button is and just hits Reply. I’ll post the e-mails word for word, as they were written.

The setup: we’ve received our fourth edition Dungeons and Dragons books and we’re now eagerly anticipating our start to this wonderful new nerdly adventure.
Joe: What character are you going to choose in D&D? Go…
Brian: Tiefling Warlock
Marc: We should just send the e-mail from yesterday… it would save a lot of time. Eladrin Warlord!
David: I’ll be whatever the group needs, so once Joe makes his choice, I’ll know what I’ll be.
Joe: Autobot.
Marc: Ruined… ruined. THERE ARE NO AUTOBOTS!!! Stop crushing our D&D dreams… you crusher of D&D dreams! *sobs*
Joe: Pretty sure an elven rogue.
David: Then I shall be a human or dwarf cleric, biatches!
Brian: Now I just need to find an appropriate miniature…
David: Check your pants.
Joe: I LoLed
Brian: As did I. I hate you David.
David: Why do you continue to set yourself up so easily?

Our conversation then got back on track for a few e-mails, and ended thusly:

Joe (after a failed joke): My humor was lost without my middle fingers being waved around as I said it.
Marc: AHAHA!! Gotta love e-mails!! Man, I miss going to lunch with you guys.
Brian: Now you know how I feel. Sad and lonely
Marc: I love you Brian.
Brian: Enough to fund my epic ground mount when I hit 60?

To: Brian
From: David (That’s me!)

Hey Brian, how interested are you in buying Company of Heroes (Game of the Year edition just $19.99) and playing with myself, Joe, and Marc?

Hmm, sounds interesting. Maybe I’ll pick it up then. Do you guys have it already? Also, what’s up for lunch tomorrow?

Yes we all bought Game of the Year edition. We played it together last night. It was super fun.

The problem with us playing RTS games is that we all know Marc is going to win. It’s all a matter of who comes in second. I have the day off tomorrow and should be back by lunch time if you guys wanna meet somewhere.

Actually, Dave and I won the first game over Marc and the Computer. Dave and Marc completely obliterated me and the CPU the 2nd match. We usually go for lunch at 11:30. So just show up and we’ll decide whatever.

In my defence…THE COMPUTER SUCKS!!!

Yet, the computer lasted longer than you.

1) I thought I was fighting the PC the whole time because quite frankly, I thought you were supposed to be good at this game
2) Joe is a cheap ass, and always will be. He is not God.

1) noob
2) shut up…

1) My poop
2) Your mouth

Anways…It’s a good investment Brian. The graphics are great and the game play can be compared to Generals / Dawn of War although the controls are a bit better…These fools love tanks, that’s all that Joe gets.

It looks like fun. I read that the resources are not harvested? You accumulate them over time depending on the territory you control? On a side note, I should probably stop using my work email for this, so from now on, send everything to <email address> kthx.